Lyrics

I don't want to try Taekwondo
In his condo tonight
Jesse always wants to wrestle
Always to playfight
I like to play video games
Maybe watch some TV
But if I turn my back on him
He'll soon be attacking me
I'll soon be tumbling down
Then he will pin me down
I think I finally lost my mojo
In the "dojo" tonight
Jesse kicked my ass again
I tried to be polite
Why can't we play video games?
Or maybe watch TV?
But then I turned my back on him
And he roundhouse kicked me
Jesse, we will never go into business now
Not that you ever produced a viable plan
I'd be grateful if you would consider
Giving me back that 15 grand
Jesse, I need it for my mother's operation
Jesse, what do you get from my humiliation?
Jesse, so many big ideas above your station
Jesse, you need another outlet for your frustration
But why when those nice girls came round
Did you choose to throw them out?
And why when I have bad concussion
Would I want a second bout?
You know that I have German family
It's offensive to say "kraut"
It isn't just the protein shake
That leaves a nasty taste in the mouth
Jesse, it's been real fun and all
But you are almost 34
It's time that you repaired this broken friendship
And the hole in the living room door
Jesse, what you swinging those nunchucks for?
Jesse, why you taking that sword off the wall?